Writers block or something like that

I seem to have run dry today and I don't know why? Guess that it's a form of writer's block, not that I'd ever consider myself a real writer. Real writers have real readers, and can inspire and influence. They have ideas and ways of looking at the world and making even the dullest things interesting.

I really admire and envy those who have the ability to capture the imagination, whether it be through the written word, the spoken word, painting or music. I have always aspired to these things and never really had the talent for anything much. Oh there are things that I can do quite well; nobody is without some sort of skill, but I yearn to be really good at something. I am working at writing, but each time I read a good author, i realise that I have left it too late, much like everything else I guess.

I love the work of Margaret Attwood. She is one of many very talented Canadians, and being Canadian, few people over here have heard of her. Well that is a bit of an exaggeration, as she lives here much of the time, but she is not in the same popularity league as the likes of Steven King, Terry Pratchett, Ian Rankin and the rest of the wonderful authors that keep our bookshelves full.

She is quite prolific and thankfully there are still plenty of novels left for me to read. Reading about Canada becomes less painful as time goes by and I can immerse myself in her prose, without feelings of anger or loss.

Her characters are real and easily accessed, and I guess that is what makes for a good story, probably more so than the plot itself. Steven King maintains that he does not "plot out his books" but allows stories to unfold all by themselves. I try that, being fundamentally lazy, and then i run out of steam or get hopelessly confused. I think I need to focus on characters more, but I don't meet many people these days. I seem content to have withdrawn from the real world for most of my time, it's better for me that I do in some ways. Reaching out only seems to cause me pain and I don't want any more of that. Much better to stay numb and maintain the appearance.

I have met some wonderful people in my life and I hesitate to make use of some of them, though I don't know why. I 'd like to imagine that somewhere, somebody is using me in a book. It would be a form of immortality I guess and maybe that is what immortality is all about.

Anyway, clearly I have little to write about this morning and I am not in the mood to continue with college days, so I'll cease this rambling and do something a little more worthwhile. Having said that I haven't a clue what that will entail!!!

PS I just checked my profile - i can see that changes are needed, but I can't be bothered really. I notice that it has been accessed 243 times? Who on earth can possibly be interested?? Do feel free to comment!